So, I’ve gotten some good news from the doctor- my blood tests are looking better each time. The doctor even said, he’s reassured that things will work out just fine.

Although I am on cloud nine right now, I’m always a little scared that the other shoe will drop. At any rate, I will spend the weekend relaxing (as much as you can with a 2.5 year old) and dream about my little Sprout.

Ok, I’m being completely honest here. And since I have like, 12 readers, the threat isn’t too great that this will get around.

As you all know, I’ve had some problems with pregnancy in the past (see http://www.knittinginatree.com/?p=230) to get yourself up to speed if you don’t know).

Anyway, exactly 1 week ago, I had a positive home pregnancy test. I was surprised and ecstatic and nervous all at once. You see, I’ve been here before. I gotten myself worked up and joyful only to become saddened when the pregnancy ended.  I have decided to journal my pregnancy journey here in my blog.  I cannot think of a better way to release some of my internal stress.  And hopefully, it will help a few people as well.

Week 5: Well, I can say as of right now, I am driving myself (my doctor and my husband) crazy with the possibilities of what could go wrong. I am certain that I will experience some sort of loss associated with this pregnancy that I am absolutely batty.  I was thinking of switching OB/GYN doctors before this pregnancy even started.  But, given the treatment I’ve received in the last week, I’ve made up my mind that I am definitely switching. The doctors and staff at my current practice have blown me off as “emotional”, but after the last 2 years, I’m not sure what they would prefer me to act like.  I mean, I’m pregnant.  Aren’t all pregnant women emotional?!

In the meantime, I pray that I will receive good news from the doctor.  Experience tells me that I will have to call them to receive my test results, because they are painfully slow!  Did I mention I’m wanting to switch doctors?!

I have long suffered from the Luigi Complex. I am coining the term here and now. So, when therapists start showing up on Good Morning, America stating this as the latest craze, you’ll know you heard it here first.

For years, I have given my husband a hard time for always having to be Player 1 in any video game that we play. He has to have to Player 1 controller and be Mario. That means, I have been Luigi in EVERY game we’ve ever played. Nothing against Luigi, but he’s no Mario.

This started years ago when I played with my brother. He had the same issue- always wanting to be Player 1.  Since I’m the younger sister, again, I was always Luigi.

For years, I’ve mocked my husband for giving me what I know call a “Luigi Complex”. It’s basically defined as becoming used to second place. I’ve realized in the past several weeks that I have suffered the Luigi Complex in many facets of my life. And I’ve accepted it.

I’m guessing many of you have too. Have you ever experienced getting called to go out with a friend only to find out that their first choice wasn’t available? Have you ever moved your plans around to accommodate “Mario”?  Did “Mario” receive a promotion at work when you felt you deserved it?

I’m guessing this has happened to you as well, and while it’s fine to be flexible, it’s not fine to accept second place as being just as good as first. Lots of seconds are as not good as the first.. Lost Season 2, for example, was not as good as the Season 1. Don’t get me started on the number of sophomore albums released that are failures! And what about second date syndrome… you know where the first date is amazing, but then the guy never calls again?! (I experienced that one too)…

Perhaps it’s the second child coming out in me, but I’m a little tired of being Luigi.  So, please someone tell me, how to become my very own Mario?

Okay, I’ve been talking all year about my annual trip to Ft. Wayne, Indiana for the Vera Bradley Outlet Sale. Well, this past weekend was the big day. And all I have to say is Oh Vera!

My group of 5 lovely ladies met in Dayton at 6:30 a.m. and after breakfast at Cracker Barrel (because what’s a road trip without Cracker Barrel?), we headed off to Ft. Wayne.  When we arrive in Ft. Wayne at 10:30, we realized we were literally late to the party.  We parked at the Coliseum and got in a HUGE line.  Lest you think I am exaggerating, I took a picture of where we were in line in relation to the Coliseum where the sale is held.

Can you see the Coliseum? This was one long line!!!!

Three hours, seven minutes, a not-too-pleasant trip to the portable toilet, and a nasty sunburn later- we were allowed to enter the Coliseum.  The sale was set up just as I remembered and with pink garbage bags in hand, our group navigated the EXTREMELY crowded sale like pros.  At one point, however, the sale coordinators let a tour bus full of shoppers skip the line and enter the sale through the back door.  Later, those same shoppers were allowed to check out privately without waiting in line.  NOT COOL, VERA… NOT COOL….

I have to say that the 2009 prices and selection seemed better.  Although I did manage to drop almost $300… (I really hope my husband doesn’t read my blog!).  I did get some good finds like the clutch wallet for $15 and the Morgan handbag for $14.   Our group was tired and hungry.  We got in line to checkout.  Two and a half hours later, we checked out.

This is the second half of the checkout areas!

I cannot tell a lie.  It wasn’t the most pleasant time of my life.  Standing for hours at a time in line for discount VB is not as awesome as a massage or pedicure.  That said, several people in my group said we’d be back again next year.  I’m hoping that they weren’t just being kind to me since I planned the whole trip.

My Shopping Pals!

But, I’m hoping Vera Bradley re-considers their sale organization next year.  It’s difficult to squeeze 65,000 shoppers into 4 days.  Maybe having several sales a year or making reservations or using something similar to Disney’s FastPass system would help out.  I’m also thinking that VB should be auctioning tickets to a very special pre-sale or early admission for their foundation.

And PS- you could have made a fortune selling sunscreen and hot dogs in the parking lot this weekend!

This morning , Chris woke up with a 103 temperature.  My plans for the day were now side-tracked.  His pitiful little gaze looked up to me and told me “Mommy, please don’t go… Mommy, I need you more now than you will ever realize… please stay with me.. please make me feel better..”

Oh how I wish I could make him feel better… I made him strawberry milk, got his favorite blanket, put on his favorite slippers, and let him watch his favorite DVD, but he is just not himself.  He is sick and I can’t make him feel better.  I’m hoping that the doctor’s visit will go smoothly and he’ll be back to terrorizing our dog in no time.

In the meantime, I’m stressing about work.  I’ve had a tough time at work lately and am trying to figure out the balance of a working mom.  Before I get a bunch of negative comments, I realize all mothers are working mothers.  I am using the term for those  who have jobs outside of the home.  I struggle with balancing the obligations of work and the needs of my family and my home.  I know I am not the only one.

I try to work from home, but then realize that my son is again crying “Mommy, I need you”…  This is a tough balancing act and I’m not sure I wouldn’t fail if I didn’t have good family and friends to help me constantly… In the meantime, I am going to wipe up some tears and try to squeeze some work emails in at the same time…  By the way, I am thinking about taking on a separate job as a circus juggler… seems fit, don’t you think?